Finally starts posting again,
and now he won't shut up!
[February
8, 2004] I've been informed that this wasn't a tassel, but in fact a nipple
piercing. I was further informed, though I certainly hadn't asked for more
details, that "It's a breast ornament of sorts, with a longish 'holding
bar' running through the nipple in order to hold the, for want of a better
description, 'aerola sheild' in place. The actual nipple is showing, with
the decoration *around* it".
Eww. What a waste of a good breast. Not that I'm particularly enamored with Janet Jackson's breasts, mind you: Maybe it's the lighting, but she seems to have more hair there than I do.
But the key point here -- and that's not a nipple joke
-- is that, if you need to stare at a blown-up still shot in order to tell
what you're looking at (and some of us still need the logistics explained
to us), how the hell can anybody have really seen anything as it flashed
by for one second during the Super Bowl? Obviously there's this mass delusion
going around, everybody believing that they got to see Janet Jackson's
hairy breast.
[February 5, 2004] A Tennessee woman is suing Janet Jackson
(and Timberlake, CBS and MTV) for compensatory and punitive damages, claiming
that Jackson's exposure caused her to "suffer outrage, anger, embarrassment
and serious injury." I'm thinking Johnnie Cochran must be dying to defend
Jackson: "If it's not the whole tit, you must acquit"
[February 2, 2004] If you really believe Janet Jackson's
half-time showing during last night's Super Bowl wasn't staged, I've got
a California ranch I'd like to sell you. Twenty-five hundred acres, very
kid-friendly. Come on, she just happened to be wearing a big tassel on
her right nipple? The only way she's going to convince me would be by coming
over here dressed exactly the same way she was last night, and showing
me that she had a tassel on her left nipple as well.
I really don't care that the woman in the supermarket
this
morning was having trouble with her cell phone reception while she was
getting instructions on what fruits and vegetables her family needed: Anybody
who actually walks down an aisle saying "Can you hear me now? Can you hear
me now?" needs to be smacked.
I see we're looking at a civil war in Iraq now, and whatever
side we choose (and we are going to choose), it's going to be the wrong
one: If we choose the winning side, they're going to be perceived as American
puppets and all the rest of the Iraqis will hate us (and so will that government,
after we give them weaponry and they turn on us). If we choose the wrong
side, then we'll once again end up with an "enemy state". All in all, we're
probably better off in the long run choosing the losing side.
This whole "foreign intervention" thing is really very simple: We don't invade a country unless a) they attacked us or b) they're practicing genocide. Not for breaking a treaty, not for interfering with oil delivery, and not for invading another country. And by genocide, I mean genocide -- not just treating a minority group very, very badly. I'm talking about concentration camps and smallpox-infested blankets.
If anybody has a problem knowing whether something is
or isn't genocide, I'm willing to help you decide. Just call first, in
case Janet's here.
Victoria's Secret is selling flannel nightgowns. That's
just so very wrong.
Looking at the defense and homeland security budgets,
it's impossible to miss the fact that terrorism and other threats from
the Moslem world account for an overwhelming percentage of it. Now obviously,
it's in the best interests of neither the United States (some opportunistic
members of the administration notwithstanding) nor the Moslem community
here and abroad to have this perceived as a U.S. vs Islam conflict.
Now, the only way to remove the Moslem=terrorist link in the collective mind of the Western World would be for prominent Moslem leaders throughout the world to absolutely denounce terrorism. No equivocating. Just stand up and announce that it's wrong.
"But Billo, people have suggested this before, and it's just plain unfair that we should single out Moslems and force them to publicly denounce terrorism!"
Well you know what? This is all unfair. It's unfair to
the 3000 people who were killed when the Twin Towers came down. It's unfair
to their families. It's unfair to the people living in New York City's
Chinatown, whose businesses were destroyed when the entire area was effectively
shut down. It's unfair to everybody who travels by plane and needs to get
to the airport an hour or two earlier than before and whose flight might
be diverted because it turns out somebody accidentally carried a nail-clipper
on board or looks at a stewardess the wrong way. It's unfair to everybody.
The only people who came out ahead on this were George Bush, John Ashcroft,
Rudolph Giuliani and the asshole who was in lower Manhattan just hours
after the 9/11 attacks selling "I Can't Believe I Made It Out!" t-shirts.
Click
the flame if you think I'll care.
